Thursday, November 17, 2005

Clemson Constitution (Proposed and Benevolently Modified)


  1. No females

  2. No dopes, only people who enjoy to enjoy, love to love, rejoice to rejoice, especially over smoke, wine, liquor and beer, and can handle good manly humor without pointing their prudish noses up at us.

  3. Everyone is required to post at least once in a Blue Moon. (equal to 1 fortnight and 3 days)

  4. Any nude pictures must be blurred in the genitalia and breast (if Fem) areas. (No causing of our brothers to sin in that cat please, I struggle there enough already!)

  5. Any criticisms of one's post must be posted for all to see, so that we all have turn to retaliate for, or against, the one criticized.

  6. ...
As the blog despot (the only one with administrative access), I will allow this amusing ritual in the interest of promoting the appearance of a democracy and keeping the natives happy. You can vote/comment on this entry. Let me offer a few considerations. You’ll notice that I already modified the constitution and have excluded divisive references to Baptists and teetotalers. How do you people expect to craft unifying documents when the first thing you do is to set about excluding people? Is there no room among us for conscience or Christian unity? Most of us, myself included, don’t come from pure Presby backgrounds, and I certainly don’t think the brew is a biblical mandate, unless we want to start mandating the enjoyment of blessings (we could vote on that, I suppose). We can only pray for both our fully immersed and fully parched brethren. I fully concur with the nudity clause, since I don’t ever want to wake up to seeing any one of you naked.

Finally, remember that other people look at this site all the time. It has come to my attention that some of you didn’t know that so I just thought I’d head that one off at the pass. I know that since we started the blog, my profile has been viewed 70 times, which means that someone other than y’all is looking at it (I hope). Some of them are people we know, although I have no idea how they found it so quick…

Finally (part deaux), the picture is for Clayton, like throwing a bone to the junkyard dog. Have fun buddy.

10 comments:

CL80N said...

"Junkyard Dog," is that what you think of me, some way to show your appreciation! I will however tell you know that this one will be no-where near what you expect, how about that you dirty-minded little Lepricaun!

Bobe said...

I was actually hoping that it would be nowhere near the possibilities I can imagine... Go for it JD.

Asiatic Wild Ass said...

I shall smite the ruin of all who seek to destroy me!! That picture is pure exploitation!!! I feel, I feel, I feel molested and violated!

Aryan Nation said...

I would like to introduce the no Mark Wells clause...

Aryan Nation said...

I still say that we exclude the very few people we know that do not approve of anyone drinking. I just think its pointless to invite someone to a blog about the good times we had in college that did sometimes include the brew who thinks its sin or beneath good Christians.

JMO.

But we definitely shouldn't cast the proverbial stone at guys like D.B. His mental acuity alone makes him eligible in my book. Eligible for the blog and the women.

Bobe said...

To Joe: I have a feel you ARE about to be violated, photographically speaking... To Blake: both very good distinctions, the blog despot is on board. In my personal opinion, the most important immediate goal is for DB to post a picture... Are you listening DB?

Asiatic Wild Ass said...

To Bob: what I've been screamin' this whole time! WHERE FOR ART THOU DAVIDOUS MAXIMOUS BARRON! Stand in thee light, not in thy dark...

To Bob again: its time to dust off BGW my friend (or fiend?)

Bobe said...

if you hadn't noticed, the pic of you IS from BGW...

CL80N said...

Joey: Is that a cigar in your back pocket or are your hemroids just happy to see me?

Asiatic Wild Ass said...

That's my man purse...