Clemson alumni, James, attended a wine-tasting event at a local Tennessee winery, Chateau Ross, the other day. The event was church sponsored. "The important thing is that nobody got seriously injured." said a local bystander, A. Whit Ness, who was at the scene of the accident. "He just kept drinking and drinking. A little sampling here. A little sampling there. Things just started to get out of control after a while."The only thing confirmed at this point is that James had a good time, "Uh, yeah, [the wine-tasting] was really great. Who are you and what are all these people doing here?" One story going around is that he, after the event, mounted his black stallion, unsheathed his weapon, and maimed his victims by jabbing the pointy tip of his battle-axe into their eyes.
A contradictory story tells how he, walking outside with wine and spittle running down his beard, passed out. He got back up in a few minutes, began flailing his arms around while jumping up and down, and finally passed out again. Victims from this account were not scarce. The unofficial count is 20 dead, 43 wounded and 1 person who got his feelings hurt. Unfortunately, none of these stories have been confirmed.
Chateau Ross is a winery found in Springfield, Tennessee. They are known for their many award winning wines, such as McMahan and Big Bitch Red. James gave the Big Bitch Red his well-renowned award, "This One Didn't Hurt So Bad When I Puked It Up" Award. Chateau Ross' "Passion" won the "This One Didn't Stain My Shirt So Bad When I Puked It Up" Award. Chateau Ross regularly gives tours and sells wine in several stores. Below is their information:
Deborah Proctor
5823 Fulton Rd
Springfield, TN 37172 (ROBERTSON County) Phone: (615) 654-9463
E-mail: chateauros@aol.com
~The News Norweigan
2 comments:
As the wise man said "White wine opens a woman's mind. Red wine opens her legs."
as an even wiser man said, "white wine opens a norwegian's mind, red wine makes him stumble around and smack people."
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